A Piece of Kake

Neil has a strategy for owning vehicles. Here it is:

1. Perhaps this goes without saying, but I’ll say it anyway: Never buy a brand-new car. This is one of the worst investments you could make, comparable to buying stock snap bracelets. Instead buy a fairly new car, two or three years old. There are people crazy enough to get a new car every couple years, so find them or their dealer and buy their “old” car. They’ve already taken the huge financial hit of losing thousands of dollars by driving the car out of the dealership. In the first second that you own a new car you lose a ton of money. But if you can find a fairly new car, much of that loss has already been suffered. And you didn’t have to suffer it.

If you go this route you can hopefully avoid a car payment by saving up for this purchase. You’ll need some serious dough, but shop around and make sure you take someone who knows about cars with you to look at it. Luckily Neil fits this description. If you can’t avoid the car payment, go for the shorter loan and pay it off faster than you have to.

You want to have one reliable car if possible. Reliable car is an oxymoron because any car can break anytime—even a brand-new one. But of course the risk increases with age, so get something fairly new. When Neil’s station wagon died we only had one car for a month while he shopped around for an inexpensive vehicle. But at least we had my trusty Focus to get around in. I would drop him off at work in the morning and then use the car during the day. You don’t want two beaters because they could both go at the same time and then you’re screwed.

2. For a married couple, your second car should be an inexpensive one, which probably means older. It might be a beater, but remember, you have your more reliable car in case this one breaks. This strategy works much better if you know how to fix cars, or know someone who knows how to fix cars. Mechanical labor isn’t cheap and you can save a ton by doing the work yourself. Remember, this is Neil’s strategy and it works because he can fix a lot of common car problems.

You don’t want one car payment, but you really don’t want two. And you probably don’t need two. So drop your pride and get an old ride. Neil insists on driving the junkie car because he drives less than me and he’d rather be the one to break down. I appreciate this, and I also appreciate that he doesn’t take his identity from driving some hot-rod. Some of the high school kids even seem to look up to him for driving modest wheels, because it demonstrates his simple lifestyle and non-worldly values.

3. Get regular oil changes. I always have my eyes open for sales or coupons on oil changes. Then when I need one I know where to go. Although Wal-mart is cheap, I don’t recommend going there because their auto department is awful (at least the one near us). Sometimes they won’t even acknowledge you for twenty minutes, and you still might have an hour and a half wait ahead of you. Speedy Monro and Firestone often have good specials or coupons. Make an appointment, wherever you go. The ten-minute places are fast, of course, but you pay almost double for the convenience. It’s not worth it to me—it wasn’t even when I was working 60+ hours a week. There’s always something you can read or study for an hour, so slow down for once and save yourself $20.

Keep up on oil changes.

I hear doing an oil change yourself costs about $15. With a coupon you should get out for around $20. So if you want to save $5 and freeze your husband, go ahead. But during Ohio winters saving $5 every couple of months doesn’t seem worth it.

4. Drive it till it dies or becomes too much of a money pit due to repairs. At some point your good car will probably become your junk car. I hope the Focus has several years before it makes this transition. I’m also hoping the Shadow makes it at least a year. But for the price we paid, we already got our money’s worth in the six months we owned it.

Neil was told me about someone at work whose “car died.” He went out and bought a new one that day. But his car didn’t die at all. One of the accessories just broke. I used to think if your car was broken, you couldn’t drive it. Of course it depends on the problem, but it generally isn’t all-or-nothing as I once thought. Neil has kept cars going long past their prime, including the infamous swamped station wagon, which my parents gave him for free instead of junking it. Once he replaced the carpet and fixed some of the electrical problems, he actually considered it a nice car for some time. It was by far the newest car he’d ever owned.

Ken Rockwell has a different strategy to car-buying. He advises you buy something nice (used) that will hold its value, like a Mercedes. They don’t depreciate much so you can sell it years later for close to the price you paid. Then you basically drove it for free, excluding repairs and gas. But you need some capital to get this plan off the ground, because if you’re paying interest on a loan it certainly isn’t free. Ken’s clever saying, “I can’t afford to drive a Ford,” sounds nice, but Neil’s plan is more realistic for most of us.

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